God Bless India

The Health Ministry has adopted an innovative approach to solve India's health problems. It's damn simple to follow -

First, deny all facts and figures presented by any respectable world body. How dare they show this great country in poor light? The health minister comprehensiely rejected the UN Report on AIDS victims in India recently. Facts and research be damned!

Second, look for soft targets - Bollywood makes for an excellent punching bag. The health ministry recently decided that Bollywood films were the root cause for all the health problems of this nation. So, they decided to put a complete ban on promoting smoking on screen and probably intend to ban endorsements of soft drinks by film stars.

This list can be easily extended - ban stunts in movies especially ones involving vehicles as they encourage people to drive recklessly, ban party scenes which involve alcohol and fattening food for obvious reasons and so on. I can already visualize members of the censor board signing up at the employment office! If this goes on, the only movies that will go past the health ministry are the ones like Gulshan Kumar's "Chaar Dhaam" and a couple of documentaries on Amarnath Yatra and Haj.

I feel that the Finance Ministry would do well with this approach. First, reject the UN standard for 'poverty'. I mean $1.00 a day is a lot of money in India, you know? Redefine poverty levels so that the percentage of people below the poverty line is around 10%. Then, ban all depictions of poverty in Bollywood movies. There should be no poor people in any movie. After all, people watch these movies outside India and form impressions.

There... India is well on its way to being a 'super power'.

Cruelty

towards animals is well known and we even have groups like SPCA and PETA to oppose cruelty. What about cruelty towards animal lovers? ;-)

Any takers for SPCAL (Soceity for Prevention of Cruelty towards Animal Lovers)?

India, Pak agree to end terrorism

No, today is June 1st, not April 1st. I know, that's what I thought when I saw this news item. It talks about some new found friendship and trust among the bitter enemies. Who are they trying to fool?

What should become of the poor politicians who depend on this animosity between the people to get elected to the parliaments and assemblies year after year irrespective of performance? What should Sunny 'Indian' Deol and Ajay Devgan do to cover up their hopeless acting skills if there is no Paki-bashing in movies anymore? What should those poor generals in their multi million dollar mansions on both sides of the border do? How will they get their million dollar kickbacks for purchasing low quality defence equipment?

Sheesh... we wont even get to see hi-fi operations like Operation Vijay, Operation Parakram, Operation some-damn-shakti. No more nuclear warfare? I thought that would be cool! Earth would be 20% lighter straight away!

India and Pak agree to end terrorism... ya right and I am the King if England!